LET NOT THE WIFE DEPART

This command directly links with the Lord’s teaching on this subject, ‘yet not I, but the Lord’. The clear teaching of scripture is that marriage is for life and particularly so where believing couples are concerned. However, in verses 10-11, it seems the Lord allows separation, in extreme circumstances: where the husband’s behaviour is such as to cause his wife’s life to be intolerable because of physical or mental abuse.

In these verses it appears that married couples, where both partners are believers, are being addressed. This is apparent because those believers who have been saved and who have unbelieving partners are separately addressed in verses 13-16.

The scripture says ‘but and if she depart’, v. 11, it being left to the injured person in each case to decide before the Lord what is the right course. The degree of abuse, whether physical or mental, is not defined. It is well established that mental abuse can often be as injurious as physical, although the marks of the latter are often more evident.

For the wife to leave the husband is a very serious and undesirable step and must surely be an absolute last resort. This is why in verse 10 the injunction is ‘let not the wife depart’. Every effort must be made, not only by the wife but by both parties, to save the marriage. Problems should be worked through, prayed over, solutions found, behavioural adjustments made, respect and kindness shown. The name of the Lord is at stake! If Christian couples split up, how will the testimony be affected and the Lord’s name blasphemed?

Too often today, maybe because of the ease of divorce and the practices of the world at large, even some believers have a tendency to treat the vows they made before the Lord on their wedding day as of little consequence. Today’s scripture should never be used as an excuse to separate on the basis of some petty problem or temporary difficulty. Things would need to be extremely serious in a marriage, and the problems ongoing, before separation could ever be contemplated. Remember, Christian couples set forth to a sinful and lost world the truth of Christ and His bride the church.